Monday, June 27, 2016

OKC Pride 2016

So Pride 2016 has come and gone. This year's celebration has been a bit somber with the Orlando Pulse shooting. However, the gay community will heal and push onward.

OKC's Pride is truly something. We are inundated with tourists and surprisingly, there are usually more straight people in attendance than gay people. Below are some pictures and videos of myself, friends and of the activities.

OKC's gay bars are unique. Many people would be surprised to learn that we have multiple gay bars when certain larger cities only have a few. Most of our gay bars are located in what is called "The Strip". It's also referred to as "gay town" or "The Gayborhood". We have the largest gay resort in the Southwest, called The Habana Inn, complete with multiple pools, bars and a restaurant (Gushers). Located within walking distance are 8 gay bars/clubs. Three are located in the Habana Inn itself. We have The Finish Line, a gay country bar/club, The Copa, a gay bar/dance club, Tramps, a gay bar, The Boom, a gay bar and drag entertainment, Phoenix Rising, a lesbian bar, The Wreck Room, a dance club for the younger crowd (currently closed), Apothecary 39, a gay hipster bar, and Angles, OKC's oldest gay bar/dance club (currently open only for special occasions). Additionally, there are two other lesbian bars, Partners and Alibis, that are a bit further away. Every Pride people come from multiple states away just to attend the festivities. This year my friends and I met two men from England who came down as well. As a whole Pride celebrations last the entire month of June but with most focus on the week of Pride and the Friday, Saturday and Sunday at the end of Pride week. The weekend of Pride kicks off with an annual block party. Saturday is for a gay arts festival and concert at night. The celebrations conclude with the annual Pride parade on Sunday. All three days, Friday, Saturday and Sunday, the bars are packed, normally with long lines to gain entrance.

The parade is perhaps the most attended activity during Pride. During the parade beads, condoms and candy are thrown. This year our parade was cut short by a torrential downpour of rain. The parade continued but most attendees made a mad dash for cover, their cars, or to the nearest gay bar until the storm passed. I was completely drenched!

If you are in the OKC area in June around the Summer Solstice then do mark it on your calendar and make plans to attend. You won't be disappointed!

Crystal

I look like I'm a little boy sitting on my bestie's lap!

Being goofy with Crystal

Drunk me

Michelle and I walking toward the parade

Ducked into Angles to get out of the rain.

Eddie

 Some blue haired chick

Boutique where you can buy the standard homosexual uniforms.


T.J. with his wizard's staff

Chris

The concert 

Drag queen

Out & proud military men



Apologies in advance as the videos are not that good because of the storm. It began storming about 10 minutes into the parade. Sad, but what can you do?

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This is Angles, OKC's oldest gay bar. My best friend and I ducked in there to seek cover from the storm.

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Tuesday, June 21, 2016

In Honor Of Gay Pride Week - Remembering Hollywood's First Out Actor

His name was William "Billy" Haines. He was the number one box-office star in 1930. Just a few years later and he was blacklisted from ever working in Hollywood again. His rise and fall began at the age of a 14 when he had his first sexual experience, a homosexual encounter. From then on there was no denying his sexual persuasion. At the age of 15 he ran off with a boyfriend. By 16 he was in New York City and was "kept" by multiple men and women. He was discovered at the age of 22, in 1922 and was offered a contract with MGM. In 1926 he first began receiving attention and praise for his work. This was also the year that he would meet the love of his life, James "Jimmy" Shields. Then the unthinkable happened. With the depression came a turn in public opinion. Homosexuality was no longer tolerated, not even for a masculine gay guy like Billy.  Billy was given an ultimatum. Either break it off with Jimmy and then marry a woman to give the impression to the world that he was a  "normal" straight man or never work in Hollywood again. Billy said no deal as nothing was worth losing Jimmy. As a result he was blacklisted from working with a big Hollywood studio ever again. His acting career was finished but Billy wasn't. He simply reinvented himself and became the number one interior designer to the stars. Billy's faithfulness to living a truly authentic life shone like a rare jewel. In a sea of illusion Billy was remarkably real. The love between Billy and Jimmy was so strong and passionate that when Billy died of lung cancer at the age of 73, Jimmy couldn't live without him. Jimmy killed himself just three months later. The couple had been together nearly 50 years.

To read more about the first "out" actor in Hollywood, read Wisecracker: The Life And Times Of William Haines, Hollywood's First Openly Gay Star by William J. Mann. 

The following documentary, Out Of The Closet, Off The Screen: The Life Of William Haines (2001), is based in part on the above biography.



To listen to a podcast about William Haines, click the link below.

You Must Remember This - William Haines: Hollywood's First Openly Gay Marriage 

William Haines' interior design company is still in operation today. Check out the website below.

WilliamHaines.com 

Sunday, June 19, 2016

Very Powerful Week Ahead!

So as most of us prepare for another work week ahead I thought I should take some time to remind people that this week is set to be the most powerful week of this year. There is a lot going on this week.

Sunday, June 19, 2016 - Tuesday, June, 21, 2016  is the Full Moon. As workers and witches may know, the full moon is the most powerful time of the month for the performing of spells. It is the time when magical workers are considered to be at their most powerful. This time would be extremely good for gathering Full Moon water. June's Full Moon is called the Strawberry Moon, Rose Moon or Honey Moon.

http://mysecrethoodoo.blogspot.com/2011/08/full-moon-water.html

Monday, June 20, 2016, is the Summer Solstice, the official start of the Summer season and the longest day of the year with regard to daylight hours. This day is also known as Midsummer and for Wiccans and witches, is also known as the sabbat of Litha. Expect Wiccans, witches and Druids to go crazy at Stonehenge.



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Friday, June 24, 2016 - June 25, 2016, is St. John's Eve/St. John's Day, the most sacred and powerful day for practitioners of Voodoo. This day celebrates the Summer Solstice and is considered to be the most powerful time for the performing of all good or beneficial spells. It is traditional on St. John's Eve to gather water from a local river. This "St. John's Water" is then used to keep away the law and enemies through the year. For more information, click the link below.



http://mysecrethoodoo.blogspot.com/2012/06/st-johns-water.html

It is also traditional to gather St. John's Wort at this time of the year. The plant is then hung around the home to ward of evil and witchcraft.

http://mysecrethoodoo.blogspot.com/2012/02/st-johns-wort.html

Friday, June 24, 2016 - Sunday, June 26, 2016, is the annual Pride festival celebrated in most major cities. Pride commemorates the Stonewall riots of 1969, when mostly African-American transgendered people had enough of intolerance and police brutality. At that time it was still against the law for gay people to congregate in their own establishments. Most of the gay establishments were actually owned by the mafia which used their influence to try to keep the law at bay. However, with the Stonewall Inn in Greenwich, NY, this failed. Patrons got tired of routine police raids and realized that if you want equal rights you have to demand them and fight to get them. Thus, a major series of riots ensued. The birth of the LGBT activism was a result.

In the past Pride festivities were very much risque and not something straight people would want to bring their families too. Everything has changed as younger generations of LGBT people have come into their own. Today's Pride festivities are very inclusive of all people and persuasions. Pride festivities are also becoming quite the trend with straight people. The same is true with straight people going to gay bars. In my area, it's believed that roughly 75% of patrons of our local gay bars are straight. Sure, women like to go because they can have a good time without having to worry about being hit on by creeps. However, gay bars are a ton of fun and a very different environment to traditional straight bars. It is trendy for straight men to go to gay bars as well. Most of them seem to bask in the attention they receive from gay men. Big ego-booster I assume.

As Pride festivities become more mainstream expect their significance and local importance to grow. My local Pride festival is expected to draw over 100,000 people this weekend and in larger cities I would assume the number would be far greater. Clear your calendars because this weekend is an excellent time to go out and party!







This years Pride festivities will be especially important as we remember the victims of the Orlando Pulse shooting. The shooting stands as a perfect reason why we need Pride festivities and gay activism.

Wednesday, June 15, 2016

Standing With Orlando Pulse Victims, Family And Friends

My apologies for not blogging on this sooner. My life has been very hectic as of late. My heart was truly broken for the victims of the Pulse shooting. I can not begin to understand the pain and emotional turmoil the family and friends of the victims must be going through. Though I didn't know any of the victims personally, a friend of mine did and lost 4 friends in the attack.

 I am outraged that this occurred in 2016, a time when our society has made so much progress toward the implementation of basic human rights for everyone. I am also outraged that this occurred in the month of June, the month where Pride celebrations are held around the nation. I do not think that this is a coincidence. I think the shooter specifically chose this time to do what he did. I also knew from the beginning that the killer was a self-hating gay man who could not accept himself and so lashed out at others in an attempt to destroy that part of himself.

Forty-nine people dead. Fifty-three people injured. Most of the victims were young, in their early 20s and 30s. They had their whole lives ahead of them. An act of hatred robbed them of their future and potential.



Please show your support for the gay community. Prayers are wonderful but let's not fall into the trap of thinking that prayers are all that we should be doing. Action speaks louder. Donate blood. Give to gay charities. Show support to the gay community. If there is a Pride celebration in your area, go to it. Let the world know that love will always conquer hate.

Thursday, June 9, 2016

A Haunting Case And A Warning To Young Gay Men



On the night of March 4, 2016, twenty-six year old Joey LaBute got back from a date and decided to go out and meet friends and family at a local gay bar. Around midnight, Joey told his friends and family that he was going to get a drink. However, Joey was caught on camera going into the restroom and then leaving the bar by himself. His friends and family then texted him with no reply back. A family member called him and he answered and said that he was driving and then hung up. A final text of jumbled letters made to his aunt was the last communication Joey LaBute made. He was never seen alive again. Three weeks after going missing his body was found in a local river. At autopsy no cause of death was determined but it was concluded that there were no drugs in his system and that he had a high blood alcohol content which may have been caused by the decomposition process. Even more shocking, the coroner believed that Joey LaBute was most likely dead before having his body placed in the water as there was no water found in his lungs or stomach. Joey's car was found in the exact place he originally parked it and it is unlikely that he was driving it as he claimed during the phone call.

What happened to Joey LaBute?

Below is an episode of True Crime Garage podcast where the hosts discuss this case.




A warning to young gay men.....

There have been claims that Joey LaBute was on Grindr. If so, Joey LaBute may have met with foul play while hooking up with a guy for quick sex. This may explain why Joey left the bar, why he didn't reply to texts, and why he lied and said that he was driving. If this is true it automatically leads to speculation that there may be a serial killer on the loose, one who targets young gay men. If you are currently using Grindr for quick sex please show extreme caution. You never know if the guy you are going to hook up with is sane or a complete psycho.

Due to the mysterious circumstances of Joey LaBute's death, some speculate that he was the latest victim of the so-called "Smiley Face Killers", more info below.


If you live or were in the Columbus, OH, area, especially the area of the Union Cafe on the night of March 4 and early morning hours of March 5, and recognize seeing Joey LaBute, especially in the company of an unknown man or men, or if you have information that you feel may be important to the solving of this case then please call the Columbus, OH, police at 614-645-4730.

Sunday, June 5, 2016

Mandy's Reading

This is Mandy (fake name for anonymity). She recently got an email reading from me and this is her experience.



Sent: Friday, June 03, 2016 at 2:13 PM
From: xxx
To: DocConjure <mysecrethoodoo@mail.com>
Subject: your reading was AMAZING

Hi Doc



I want to give a testimony for DocConjure.



My reading with Doc was amazing!!I had 10 questions email reading with Doc on Thursday  June 2 2016.

I had come to him for a reading and love work. He was pleasant and thoughtful, not judgmental at all.

 he was able to answer all my questions and it  is very accurate as the things he was telling me what is going on in my life and He also told me things I suspected about my lover .The reading with Doc is only the beginning. There is more work to do and I would like done by him, and I'm sure he will get the job done. I can’t wait to start and to see the result.

Monday, May 23, 2016

Are You Being Strung Along?

We've all had it happen to us. We meet a hottie or someone we are really attracted to. We may even feel like we formed a strong connection with them. All the signs of mutual attraction are there. The body language reveals attraction and interest. You may even sleep together. Everything goes great until things change. All of a sudden the guy or girl acts differently. It's almost as if they have suddenly become a different person. All of a sudden what appeared to be a solid foundation to build a relationship upon now appears more like quicksand. If you can relate to this then chances are you've been strung along before.

As a conjure worker who does a lot of love work I routinely am approached by clients who are being strung along by the person they wish to have a relationship with. Most of them do not appear to know they are being strung along. That's the purpose of me writing this blog entry.

So what exactly am I talking about when I say "strung along"? Another name for it is "leading someone on". Stringing someone along is a deceptive game that players play. In effect they are putting a leash on you and walking you around as their pet, that is until they bore of you and abandon you. There is no true love or feelings there for you. There is no hope of a relationship. It doesn't matter if you are a man or woman, straight or gay, everyone is capable of being either a player or a victim. Let's take a look at some of the classic warning signs that you may be being strung along by some one.

Classic Signs You Are Being Strung Along

1. The person never actively attempts to reach out to you for communication.  If you are always the one who has to text, call or go over to their place to see them then this is a bad sign. If he or she actually liked you they would actively attempt to contact you. This is just a game to them. They have no actual interest in you and thus will not actively attempt to communicate with you.

2. The person only selectively replies to texts or returns phone calls. They are only giving you the bare minimum they feel is needed to keep you hooked on them. Again, if they were truly interested in you they would be actively seeking to communicate with you.

3. The person only wants to make contact when they need something from you. Sorry, but you've been shelved. You are just a toy they take off the shelf when they feel like playing or when they need something from you. You mean nothing to them.

4. The person never wants to have sex with you. The overwhelming majority of people are sexual with only a minority of people being asexual. Therefore, if a person truly was interested in someone there would be a desire for physical intimacy. No desire indicates no true interest.

5. The person only wants to have sex with you on their timetable, when they want to. If you find that this is true it means they are using you and are not interested in your desires. You are just a sex toy to them and as such your desires do not count.

6. The person always tells you what they think you want to hear or always agrees with you. This is especially true at first when they are trying to reel you in. In a true relationship people will have differing thoughts and opinions. You will learn to tolerate each others' views.

7. The person always gives you an excuse when you confront them about their behavior. One of the most common excuses used is "I'm busy with work". Nobody's job takes up 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. They are lying to you. It only takes 2 seconds to answer a text. Remember that.

8. The person feeds you fantasies of futures or goals together but makes no attempt to make them a reality. Pay close attention if the fantasy changes. When they sense you shook off one fantasy they will create a new one for you to believe in.

9. The person avoids any emotions or intimate talk. This is in regards to emotions outside of the fake ones they use to get you hooked on them. It is very common in today's age for these people to only want to text their victims because texting is so impersonal. If they refuse to speak to you on the phone or are hesitant and avoid situations where they are forced to interact with you in a more personal way then it's a sign they are stringing you along. If they truly liked you they would want intimate close contact with you, and more importantly, they would open up to you about their feelings or express them in some manner.

10. If the person doesn't want to be seen with you in public, doesn't want to take you out on a date in public, doesn't want you to meet their friends, etc., then you are being strung along, period! This is a huge warning sign that they do not view you as a potential mate. You are prey to them. You are beneath them and they do not want to be tarnished by being seen together with you in public.

Now that you know some of the classic warning signs let's look at some interesting things about people who constantly string people along.

What You Need To Understand About People Who String People Along

1. They are vampires and parasites that are using you for usually one or more of the following three things; sex, money, or feeding their ego.

2. Most of them have very poor self-esteem and even though their egos are inflated they are also very fragile. They need constant ego-boosting in order to maintain their inflated egos. If they do not get such their egos crash and they become very despondent. These vampires feed by mind fucking their victims and stringing them along.

3. Many to most of them were either fat, unattractive, nerdy, or a dork in the past. Even though they may be a perfect 10 now they still carry with them their former self image and attempt to compensate with their overly inflated egos.

4. They hate you. They despise you. They make fun of you behind your back. They tells lies about you and spread rumors and gossip. They secretly hate you because you are stupid enough to like or love them.

5. Many to most people who habitually string other people along are mentally ill or suffer from a personality disorder, such as Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

6. It is very common for these people to be current or former drug addicts and alcoholics. A criminal background is also possible.

So the big question is, how do we stop them? How can we prevent becoming victims to people who wish to string you along?

How To Prevent Becoming A Victim , Take Your Power Back And Turn The Tables On Them

1. Listen to your gut instinct. If your gut instinct is telling you the person is stringing you along then it most likely is true.

2. Show apathy and disinterest. These people want their prey to constantly give them emotional reactions, either of love, anxiety, obsession or even anger and hatred. The one thing they can not tolerate is apathy. They can't feed off of apathy. So showing apathy toward them is the same as throwing a monkey wrench into their plans for you. Remember, you can easily fake apathy. It doesn't have to be genuine. Even if you are torn up inside and still have feelings for them you must learn how to fake apathy.

3. Take control of the conversation. You can do this by cutting conversations short, not allowing conversations, and then ending conversations when you chose to end them. Remember, these people already are only wanting to contact you on their terms and timing. So if you take control of the communication in this manner it will highly upset them. One classic technique is to interrupt them abruptly wile they are feeding you bull shit. Remember to do it in an apathetic manner, not showing anger or any emotion. Let them talk and then respond, "Sorry, I'm going to have to let you go..", and then hang up the phone without allowing them to respond. Do a similar thing to end the conversation when you want it to end and not when they chose to end it.

4. Turn them down for sex. Even if you do want it. Reject it. Show apathy and disinterest. If you really want to hurt them mock their skills in the bedroom or tell them they are boring in bed.

5. Reject the false fantasies and goals they feed you. You can even mock them. Laugh and tell him/her how stupid and silly such ideas are.

6. Learn to respond with "maybe" instead of a yes or no when they ask you questions or want you to commit to doing some action. Your real answer is no but you want them to feel ambiguity and a little anxiety. This is especially true if the only want you because they need something from you. Give them the run around.

7. Stop contacting them. When you stop contacting them they will pick up on the fact that their prey is trying to make a run for it and will then usually contact you to keep you hooked. You can then implement these techniques on them.

8. If you reach the point where you finally want to sever the "relationship" completely let them know you know they are trying to string you along. Make sure you do it in the correct manner. Never ask them if they are stringing you along because you are giving them your power. I like to tell them that I know they are stringing me along and that I don't mind because I'm bored. It has worked so far for me. Every time I did this I have received no further contact from such people. Once they know that you know the gig is up and they move on.

If you play your cards right it is possible to reverse the table on them to the point where they become obsessed with you and begin to feel all the mind-fuckery and anxiety they invoked in you. It's a very sweet experience to watch them squirm and lose their shit!

Now, I need to let my readers know a couple of things below.

1. A person is not stringing you along if they are honest with you and tell you they only want sex. If you are pushing a relationship then you are stringing yourself along and they are innocent. The same goes if you are willingly giving them money or items or doing things for them because you want to do it. You can't later hold such over their heads and claim to be the victim.

2. I would advise that you not seek to do any love work on these people. You are not going to have a satisfying romantic relationship with them. If you don't cut it off, and even if you temporarily turn the tables on them, eventually it will return to the point where they have full control over you again. You will not change them. You can only teach them a lesson and turn them loose. Remember, these people are horribly damaged goods. You can't fix them.

3. Even though you shouldn't do love work on them you can do enemy work on them or revenge work. Remember, that deep down inside and far beyond their inflated egos, they are very damaged souls. As such they are very easy to destroy or push over the edge, if you know what you are doing.